Dubs

Dubs (also known as Dubmeister, Dubbo, Dubbius, Dubstep, Duncan, Dennis, Big Toe and Auntie Margaret), is one half of the titular Dubs 'N' Chubs. Every time he is asked his age, he gives a completely different answer. From this information, we can only narrow down his real age to be within a range of 7 years - 140,000 years old. His place of origin is also unknown. When asked, the federal government claimed '' 'we noticed a baby in a hospital, it was spitting some hot bars through the hospital intercom, and no parents in sight. We have concluded Dubs has no biological parents, and is the product of swag itself''.'

Dubs had not officially released music under his own name until he and chubs formed Dubs 'N' Chubs. He claims the 'N' stands for 'neoliberal market conditions'.

Dubs would frequently dip his toes into the music industry, producing songs such as ' High ' by Max Harris, ' EmiLy ' by Emily Montes, ' Emily montes ' by Emily Montes, and ' Emily montes (Corona is crazy) ' by Emily Montes. When meeting Chubs, Dubs stated in an interview with NME: '''Chub man good rap, music good also. Me and he make music'' '.

He is known for his 'hot bars', an audio phenomenon which is classed as a Class B psychological weapon by the United Nations. The condition forces the listener to step away and physically recuperate before continuing to listen. As a result he is banned from entering numerous countries worldwide, including China, the Democratic Republic of the Congo and Mozambique.

He and Chubs would go on to win 2 Grammy Awards, but never showing up to the ceremony, with Dubs leaving a receipt on stage for a box of chicken nuggets he purchased from McDonald's. It is unknown why he chose to do this. Many see it as a statement and a directed insult at the establishment.

Forming of Dubs 'N' Chubs
Dubs met Chubs through online children's game 'Club Penguin', which ceased operations in January 2017, so it is unclear how they had both access to the original website. They had both entered the pizza parlour with their hot babes, and saw a glimpse of each other across the room. In a moment of clarity, they both ditched their respective dates, and instead talked about music and their passion behind it.

In May 2020, amidst the COVID-19 pandemic, they both discussed creating music together. When questioned by Rolling Stone, Dubs had remarked 'music industry boring. We change. We reinvent. Better music yes.' As soon as they had formed, they already had a name, and their first album miraculously created - Duality of Mens.

Backlash and legal troubles
Upon the release of 'Duality of Mens', Dubs 'N' Chubs had already surpassed a ground-breaking 4 SoundCloud followers, surpassing the previous world record set by Aubrey 'Drake' Graham in 2017. They crossed paths at the MTV Video Music Awards before the formation of Dubs 'N' Chubs, exchanging handshakes, and supposedly Dubs telling Drake: 'listen here Mr Graham if you don't make a song called Passionfruit I swear I will end your career'. In March of the same year, Drake released Passionfruit in his album 'More Life'. Dubs had received backlash for this, with many fans expressing their disgust that Dubs would let Drake make a song that Dubs had come up with.

Dubs has been known to talk to fans at events, although has never had a regular conversation with a human being. Many reports claim that Dubs frequently tells fans details about themselves or loved ones that no-one else in the world would know. This had led to legal disputes, most notably with the US Central Intelligence Agency, who had claimed that Dubs had exposed an undercover agent in deep cover because he had told the agent 'your breath smells like a CIA agent's'. The CIA claimed that this was obstruction of justice. Dubs won the case, and subsequently has never lost a case in his history of legal battles.

In April 2019, Dubs was audited by the IRS, who had claimed he was engaging in tax evasion. Following this, the IRS concluded that Dubs was not breaking the law and in fact had no accounts to audit. It was revealed that Dubs holds no assets, nor receives a regular accounted income. Strangers on the street acknowledge his presence and give him free money for his daily needs. He claims he has received upwards of $10,000 per day from an average of 1,000 people. As a result, none of this is taxable.

Political activism
Dubs has been involved in many history political and economic events throughout modern history.

In 2007, Dubs met with Jeff Bezos (pictured) and told him of the upcoming Global Financial Crisis. He stated that he would've told him earlier, but he was too busy 'cooking in the stu'. Dubs would go on to inform Prof. Michael Burry of his findings. The 'Big Short', which Dubs stars as himself, documents an abridged version of the story, painting Burry as the one to discover the crisis as Dubs claimed he didn't need the clout.

In the 2012 US Election, the president Barack Obama and candidate Mitt Romney sought for the presidential term of 2013-2017. It is speculated that Dubs had played a pivotal role in the election, with speculators at major news stations, familiar with Dubs' movements saying 'I'm pretty sure he voted for Obama ten-thousand times in one day, at the same polling station. And no one stopped him. And why would they? Tough shit I guess.'

It is currently theorised that Dubs is behind the ongoing 'short squeeze' of hedge funds in the US by purchasing GameStop stocks. Millions around the world have joined the movement. Dubs is yet to comment directly, only releasing an audio clip of him expelling gas into his phone microphone.

Relationships
Although Dubs has revealed little to none about his private life, many notable women have claimed to have dated him in the past. The following is the list of notable women that have claimed to have dated Dubs. (note: Dubs has confirmed none of these names):


 * Beyonce Knowles
 * Robyn 'Rihanna' Fenty
 * Zendaya Coleman
 * Ariana Grande
 * Martha Stewart
 * Elmo (briefly)
 * Dalai Lama Lhamo Thondup
 * Jake from the Tweenies
 * Sandra (???)
 * Taylor Swift
 * Elizabeth Gillies
 * Catherine (mentioned in 'Education Temptation')

This is widely regarded to be the most accurate list of women who have actually dated Dubs, as a real figure is impossible to calculate.

Notable lyrics
"Moo, I'm a cow, my time is now, how, HOW?"

"Just kidding I'm depressed, just kidding I'm not, or am I? Who knows. My therapist."

"They say our album is a joke, do you think I Carey?"

"Ok but did you know (straight up) that the US government was kind of shit (yeahhhhh) during the Global Financial Crisis (yeah they fuckin were)"

"Dubs and Chubs yeah they're walking in the club // They're looking cool and swag (cool and swag)"

"Goo Goo Ga Ga, you're a little baby (x8)"

"I woke up and I went to play Fortnite (epic) but windows needed to update (fuckin' shit)"